As Dr. LaMorgese eloquently puts it, if routine is the enemy of romance, adventure is its strongest ally.

When you finally stumble across a person who you can tolerate for more than one date, you know you’ve found something special. So when you decide to take your relationship to the next level by moving in together, the pressure is on to see if your twosome can make it the long haul. As author and intimacy expert Sandra LaMorgese explains, for many couples this is often a bigger decision than getting married. How come? “The honeymoon phase of cohabitation is wonderful until the real, practical challenges of the arrangement start getting in the way,” she says.

That’s why sharing the same address fundamentally shapes your relationship, for better and for worse. While date nights used to be your norm, now you spend each and every evening together. Though you used to pay your bills separately, now the heat, the hot water, the electric, the cable and the WiFi are a joint responsibility. As a breeding ground for the possibility of marriage, signing a lease with your partner is an important step, but also one that couples should never take lightly. In addition to learning how to compromise in an impactful way, it is important for men to also keep romance in mind as they build their home with another person.

Long-term love affairs aren’t always going to be rose-colored and sun kissed, but reminding your leading lady how much she means to you and how attracted you are to her is essential for the health and stability of your union. Here, a guide from experts on how you can maintain romance, even when she steals the covers every damn night:

Why You Should Prioritize Romance

Being comfortable and familiar with another person is a double-edged sword. While the permission to be fully yourself allows for vulnerability and meaningful connection, it also means you aren’t always on your A-game. And hey, you shouldn’t have to put on a show around your partner, but you should make it a priority to show them how much the relationship means to you. And vice versa. As sex and relationship expert Coleen Singer explains, unless both parties in the couple play an active role in introducing new elements to the romantic and sexual relationship to keep their relationship fresh, things can get stale after a while, leaving both of you feeling unfulfilled.

After all, without maintaining the sizzle and the romance of your couplehood, you might start to feel like roommates instead of lovers. This is dangerous territory, according to psychologist Yvonne Thomas, and something most twosomes will encounter after a few months of shacking up. “When romantic partners first move in together, things can feel quite novel and exciting. Over time, however, things tend to settle down and can become more routine,” she continues. “Without knowing it, the couple may start relating to each other in less personal, affectionate, and/or romantic ways, which can lead to one or both partners feeling invisible, resentment, disconnected, and/or unloved.”

In the worst of scenarios, that disconnect can cause a break-up. Dr. Thomas warns that without addressing the issue or making an effort to reignite the spark, one of both partners could fall out of love. “It is important to keep romance alive when you live together so that the love relationship not only remains, but can increasingly grow stronger,” she adds.

Why It’s Easy To Lose Sight Of Romance

Today, when you look at your girlfriend, you can’t imagine anyone more beautiful. And you probably don’t consider how you would ever forget to tell her how amazing she is, day-in and day-out. But, if you haven’t lived with her, you don’t know all of her habits. You might not know the ways she can annoy you by leaving a mess here and there, or the hourly swing of her moods. Even if you’ve shared a bed and spent nearly every night together, until you live with another person, you don’t know their full routine. Once you witness every aspect, it is up to you to decide if she is the type of person you can share your life and home with, forevermore. And oftentimes, this can cause both parties to see some negative qualities over positive ones, and get lost in the monotonous of a weekly schedule, instead of choosing spontaneity as you used to. “It’s easy to get caught up in whose turn it is to do the dishes, mow the lawn, pay the electricity bill, walk the dog, or any of the thousands of little chores that make a shared living space possible. Soon, living together can feel more like running a business than sharing a life with someone you love,” Dr. LaMorgese explains.

The good news? Dr. LaMorgese reassures that, when you make intentional efforts to keep the romance alive, you and your partner can find fun and healthy ways to sidestep life’s logistics and focus instead on making each other feel loved, appreciated, and celebrated.

Here’s how:

Romantic Ideas To Try With Your Partner

From ways to make your sex life a bit less predictable to sweet, simple ideas that will have her going ‘Aw!’—sex and relationship experts share their best advice for making your home a happy and romantic one:

Play Some Relationship & Sex Games Together

The first time you have sex with someone? It’s always a bit wonky and disjointed, since you’re learning one another’s bodies. But after months — and ahem, years — of getting it on, you probably can make your partner orgasm quickly and easily. Though this is the perk of a committed relationship, it can also be a downfall, since you turn to the same ‘ole position tango each and every time. To ensure your sex life keeps both of you satisfied and guessing, Singer suggests trying an adults-only type of game to challenge your senses. One she recommends is ‘Sensations Game For Lovers: Adult Board Game.’ “This puts everything together to ensure that the mood is set for soft caresses, quivers of sensual delight, communication, passion and humor. All your senses will come alive,” she shares.

Spend Time Apart

One of the greatest risks of living with someone is overstaying your welcome. It might seem contrary to the purpose of living together, but cohabiting also challenges couples to not only be comfortable with some distance, but to give each other the space they need. As Dr. LaMorgese shares, when you come home to the same place every single day, it is easy to fall into the routine of doing everything together — from errands and commuting to out-of-town trips. This is partly due to a desire to be side-by-side, but also because of convenience and efficiency. As months and years collect, this continuous connectivity can have a negative effect on romance. “Human beings have an innate fascination with the new and unfamiliar, and if you and your significant other do everything together, it can feel like there’s no newness left to discover. Such intense familiarity can lead to decreased romantic desire,” she explains.

The good news is this isn’t a tough one to solve: just spend time apart. From pursuing hobbies you enjoy to vacations with friends and working out alone, these small solo endeavors will make you miss your partner. “These little breaks from one another’s company will give you and your partner new stories to tell one another when you reconnect, and independence will restore the feelings of novelty and mystery that fuel passionate romance,” Dr. LaMorgese says.

Take A Romantic Trip Together

One way to shake up your regular life is to leave it. While, sure, you might not be able to quit your job and travel the world, you can at least leave town for a weekend to tour a new city or destination. As Singer explains, you will both be surprised how mini (or long) vacations can invigorate your relationship, romantically and sexual. Depending on your budget and how many paid days off your employer offers, consider booking a picturesque B&B a few hours away, or if time and finances allow, take a four to five day trek to Paris, Portugal, Mexico or anywhere else where you have the luxury of getting steamy.

Practice Role Playing

“For partners who live together and feel overly familiar with one another, role playing can be the ultimate relationship jumpstart,” Dr. LaMorgese says. Remember, it doesn’t have to be inspired by Fifty Shades of Grey — it can be as tame or as X-rated as you’re both comfortable with. “To make it work, you and your partner should independently come up with characters to play — new, intriguing personas to try on. Put some time and thought into the person you’ll play, and think about their interests, history, and mannerisms,” she explains.

If you want to really enjoy it and reap the most benefits, Dr. LaMorgese recommends buying a new outfit or accessory that will help you dive into your character. Then, you’re ready to test your acting skills. “Without sharing any details about your new identities beforehand, arrange to meet somewhere public, like a bar, park, or event. Once you’re there, find a way to meet up with your partner, and play out an exciting new romance between two strangers,” she explains. “Acting out a scene of love (or lust) at first sight in the midst of unsuspecting strangers is a great way to get butterflies again, even if you and your partner have been living together for years — you’ll discover brand new insights about one another, be attracted to totally new aspects of their personality, and get to fall for one another over and over again.”

Try Some New Sex Positions

Seems simple enough, sure, but when was the last time you actually attempted a new sexual position with your one and only? Most couples lose sight — and frankly, interest — with tempting different erogenous zones, and Singer says that’s a shame. You could Google, sure, but why not keep a book near your bedside table to flip through when you need a bit of inspiration? Singer recommends ‘The Little Black Book of Sex Positions’ which offers a double-whammy: countless pages of ideas, as well as a YouTube channel to reference if you need further instruction.

Try New Things Together

In addition to travel or trips, merely doing something you’ve never done before is a way to evoke romance into your relationship. As Dr. LaMorgese eloquently puts it, if routine is the enemy of romance, adventure is its strongest ally. The great news about novelty is that it isn’t as difficult to seek and find as you might think. You can get started within your neighborhood: instead of eating dinner at your go-to restaurant, try the new place that opened down the block. Skip your Netflix night in and buy tickets to a local performance or event. After your Sunday run, tour through a market or a different store. And from there? Keep going, Dr. LaMorgese says. “Try a cooking class or a new workout style together. Go for a new walk or hike, or take day trips to places that neither of you have ever visited. Search for novelty together, and you’ll begin to find novelty in one another along the way,” she adds.